While this blog did begin to keep Chase in touch with his family, it has kind of morphed into my own special memory legacy for my children. I have been reading other people's blogs and some of my favorite posts have been about the births of babies. It's so much fun to read other people's experiences. So I thought I would pull up the memory bank and write down Izzy's birth so she
can come back and read it one day. When Chase and I had been married for five months, I was still working in Pocatello full time. I was looking at the calendar scheduling mall events for the 2008 when it clicked in my head that I hadn't had a period in 8 weeks. I started feeling very flustered. It was in December, so we had a customer service center out in the common area selling mall gift cards and I usually went out to check on things during lunch so the employee could take a break. I went out there and immediately jumped online to figure out what pregnancy symptoms were. Right then my boss, Rob, walked up behind me. His number one rule about customer service was no personal Internet use. I personally didn't care because I know how boring it can be but of course he wanted to know what I was doing. When I told him, he thought I was crazy but he went down
to the dollar store and bought me a pregnancy test. Thinking back about this, he and I got along too well! But anyway I went into the bathroom and I was freaking out. I was really jumpy so I grabbed the test and I went back into my office. Right when I walked into my office, the test turned positive. I immediately hit the floor on my knees and started hyperventilating. Our AA, Tamye, grabbed a bag and picked me up off the floor. I was in trauma mode, to say the least. Rob let me go home after that. I got in my car and set off to find Chase. He was helping his brother with the lunch rush at DQ when I walked in the door and for some reason he immediately knew why I was there. He and I always have been connected in a weird way. It was a crazy time in our lives. We were in the middle of b
uying our house and we were sooooooooo young. But the next nine months went quickly. Then on Monday, August 7th, I went to the doctors office. I wasn't due until August 18 but Izzy was so big already that Dr. O didn't want me to wait until then unless I had a moral stance against being induced. At that point, I didn't want to have a C section so I decided that I could be induced. But the hospital was full. In fact, that week the hospital was above 100% occ
upied. I didn't know how that was possible until I saw shanty rooms in the hallways. Tuesday, hospital was still full. Finally Wednesday night they called with an opening. We didn't know how long we would be there, so my mom came and picked us up and took us to the hospital. But she was a nazi about me eating so I went to the hospital hungry. Luckily, the nurse said I could eat, so I got Arby's. That night, they started me on medicine to thin the cervix. The next morning, Dr. O came in at 9am to break my water. They had given me an Ambien the night before, so I actually slept through the night for the first time in forever and he actually had to wake me up. After that, the nurse came in and gave me pain medicine. I remember looking at Chase and saying, "This must be what it feels like to be high on something." I hated the feeling of not being in control but I was really tense at that point. After that, the anesthesiologist came in and I just collapsed on the nurse as he stuck me. I wa
s staring at Chase's face and he was having trouble making eye contact with me. That's when I knew it was bad. But I was so tired at that point, that I didn't care. During this time, I remember Chase telling me I have to hurry because his brother wanted to see the baby before he left for Boston. At this point, I have a million witty things that I could have said to him but then I just stared at him like I couldn't believe he was trying to tell me that. FINALLY at one o'clock in the afternoon, after being at the hospital for 16 hours, the nurse said I was ready to push. Everyone left except for Chase, my mom and my mother-in-law. I was so scared that I couldn't breathe right. So they put me on oxygen. I pushed and pushed but nothing was happening. It turned out that Izzy was coming out head first but face up instead of down and her nose was getting caught on my pelvis bone. After forty five minutes, I told the nurse I couldn't do it and I was ready to give up. Right after that, I turned and threw up in the bed pan that my mother-in-law was holding and caught a second wind. The doctor came in that point and quickly turned Izzy the right way. He stepped out and the nurse told me to push. All of a sudden, she started yelling at me to stop because Izzy's head had come all the way out with that one push and she went to get the doctor. He came back in and at 1:57 p.m. Thursday, August 11, Isabelle Grace Burke came into the world and I honestly thought she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. The epidural had caused my arms to go completely numb so I was the last one to hold her. I watched everyone pass her around and then I finally got to hold her. She was so precious. Now when I look at her, I don't seem the same sweet innocence that I did that day. Instead, I see a vibrant, precocious, fearless three year old that really could have the world at her fingertips. I also see a small tendency for her to make her life more complicated than it needs to be by being too much of a nonconformist but that is part of her charm. She is so fearless that sometimes I worry about her getting into trouble too easily. But at the end of the day, I am committed to this child with everything that I have and I want her to learn her own way and make her own mistakes. I want her to be a well rounded person that isn't scared to say her mind (hopefully in a respectful way). Something tells me though that I don't need to worry too much. She has too much going for her on this planet to end up anything less than a creative, energetic, passionate person.
While this blog did begin to keep Chase in touch with his family, it has kind of morphed into my own special memory legacy for my children. I have been reading other people's blogs and some of my favorite posts have been about the births of babies. It's so much fun to read other people's experiences. So I thought I would pull up the memory bank and write down Izzy's birth so she
can come back and read it one day. When Chase and I had been married for five months, I was still working in Pocatello full time. I was looking at the calendar scheduling mall events for the 2008 when it clicked in my head that I hadn't had a period in 8 weeks. I started feeling very flustered. It was in December, so we had a customer service center out in the common area selling mall gift cards and I usually went out to check on things during lunch so the employee could take a break. I went out there and immediately jumped online to figure out what pregnancy symptoms were. Right then my boss, Rob, walked up behind me. His number one rule about customer service was no personal Internet use. I personally didn't care because I know how boring it can be but of course he wanted to know what I was doing. When I told him, he thought I was crazy but he went down 
to the dollar store and bought me a pregnancy test. Thinking back about this, he and I got along too well! But anyway I went into the bathroom and I was freaking out. I was really jumpy so I grabbed the test and I went back into my office. Right when I walked into my office, the test turned positive. I immediately hit the floor on my knees and started hyperventilating. Our AA, Tamye, grabbed a bag and picked me up off the floor. I was in trauma mode, to say the least. Rob let me go home after that. I got in my car and set off to find Chase. He was helping his brother with the lunch rush at DQ when I walked in the door and for some reason he immediately knew why I was there. He and I always have been connected in a weird way. It was a crazy time in our lives. We were in the middle of buying our house and we were sooooooooo young. But the next nine months went quickly. Then on Monday, August 7th, I went to the doctors office. I wasn't due until August 18 but Izzy was so big already that Dr. O didn't want me to wait until then unless I had a moral stance against being induced. At that point, I didn't want to have a C section so I decided that I could be induced. But the hospital was full. In fact, that week the hospital was above 100% occ
upied. I didn't know how that was possible until I saw shanty rooms in the hallways. Tuesday, hospital was still full. Finally Wednesday night they called with an opening. We didn't know how long we would be there, so my mom came and picked us up and took us to the hospital. But she was a nazi about me eating so I went to the hospital hungry. Luckily, the nurse said I could eat, so I got Arby's. That night, they started me on medicine to thin the cervix. The next morning, Dr. O came in at 9am to break my water. They had given me an Ambien the night before, so I actually slept through the night for the first time in forever and he actually had to wake me up. After that, the nurse came in and gave me pain medicine. I remember looking at Chase and saying, "This must be what it feels like to be high on something." I hated the feeling of not being in control but I was really tense at that point. After that, the anesthesiologist came in and I just collapsed on the nurse as he stuck me. I wa
s staring at Chase's face and he was having trouble making eye contact with me. That's when I knew it was bad. But I was so tired at that point, that I didn't care. During this time, I remember Chase telling me I have to hurry because his brother wanted to see the baby before he left for Boston. At this point, I have a million witty things that I could have said to him but then I just stared at him like I couldn't believe he was trying to tell me that. FINALLY at one o'clock in the afternoon, after being at the hospital for 16 hours, the nurse said I was ready to push. Everyone left except for Chase, my mom and my mother-in-law. I was so scared that I couldn't breathe right. So they put me on oxygen. I pushed and pushed but nothing was happening. It turned out that Izzy was coming out head first but face up instead of down and her nose was getting caught on my pelvis bone. After forty five minutes, I told the nurse I couldn't do it and I was ready to give up. Right after that, I turned and threw up in the bed pan that my mother-in-law was holding and caught a second wind. The doctor came in that point and quickly turned Izzy the right way. He stepped out and the nurse told me to push. All of a sudden, she started yelling at me to stop because Izzy's head had come all the way out with that one push and she went to get the doctor. He came back in and at 1:57 p.m. Thursday, August 11, Isabelle Grace Burke came into the world and I honestly thought she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. The epidural had caused my arms to go completely numb so I was the last one to hold her. I watched everyone pass her around and then I finally got to hold her. She was so precious. Now when I look at her, I don't seem the same sweet innocence that I did that day. Instead, I see a vibrant, precocious, fearless three year old that really could have the world at her fingertips. I also see a small tendency for her to make her life more complicated than it needs to be by being too much of a nonconformist but that is part of her charm. She is so fearless that sometimes I worry about her getting into trouble too easily. But at the end of the day, I am committed to this child with everything that I have and I want her to learn her own way and make her own mistakes. I want her to be a well rounded person that isn't scared to say her mind (hopefully in a respectful way). Something tells me though that I don't need to worry too much. She has too much going for her on this planet to end up anything less than a creative, energetic, passionate person. 
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