Step one: Letting go of broken, physical objects.
When I watched my Grandfather pass, I was overwhelmed with a feeling that I can’t really explain. But the thought that were running through my head was the fact that my Grandpa worked really hard his whole life and had accumulated a lot of material things. Not an abnormal amount but just the standard things that most of us end up with over a lifetime. A car, a house, furniture… Guess what? He didn’t take any of it with him. In the end the only thing that mattered were the people he touched through out his life because his memory lives on through us, not through his things. So now that I have a mental understanding of this, I’m going to start applying it to my life.
Not so easy.
Let me take you on what promises to be an emotional rollercoaster. Actually for you out there in blogworld, this will be quite boring but maybe it will be a good illustration on how you can be vested in your stuff in a way that becomes it WRONG. Because let me tell you, a few of things actually brought real tears to the surface. Sigh.
Example #1 Approximately October 2006
Culprit: Chase
Example #2 Approximately December 2006
Culprit: Braxton
Example #3 Approximately December 2008
Culprit: Izzy
Example #4 Approximately January 2007
Culprit: Braxton
Culprit: Izzy
Katie’s Reaction: Sad. But I know the world of Hallmark Ornaments and I know they go on eBay for pennies on the dollar. So I looked this one up. Of course it was the rarest (is that really a word?) one they made that year and they are going for $90! It could have been my ticket out of here.
Izzy’s Reaction: What ornament?
Culprit: Britney, Cody’s Girlfriend
When I watched my Grandfather pass, I was overwhelmed with a feeling that I can’t really explain. But the thought that were running through my head was the fact that my Grandpa worked really hard his whole life and had accumulated a lot of material things. Not an abnormal amount but just the standard things that most of us end up with over a lifetime. A car, a house, furniture… Guess what? He didn’t take any of it with him. In the end the only thing that mattered were the people he touched through out his life because his memory lives on through us, not through his things. So now that I have a mental understanding of this, I’m going to start applying it to my life.
Not so easy.
Let me take you on what promises to be an emotional rollercoaster. Actually for you out there in blogworld, this will be quite boring but maybe it will be a good illustration on how you can be vested in your stuff in a way that becomes it WRONG. Because let me tell you, a few of things actually brought real tears to the surface. Sigh.
Example #1 Approximately October 2006
Culprit: Chase
These are matching figurines I brought back from Rome last time I was there. I have actually only been once but I’m easily entertained and I think it’s funny to see people’s reactions when I say “The last time I was there…” Back to the point. They were handmade Murano glass figurines entitled “The Last Kiss.” And I loved them. I had them proudly displayed in my kitchen for over a year. Until my husband was sweeping the floor one night, underestimated how much room was behind him and backed into the wall. They fell to the ground and it was over.
Katie’s Reaction: Screaming. Crying. Overall throwing a hissy fit.
Chase’s Reaction: Profusely apologizing, offering to find a good glass blower.
Example #2 Approximately December 2006
Culprit: Braxton
Something off about this picture? There used to be a medium sized Santa that sat in the middle of these three. I had to come up with the lame tree after my nephew, Braxton, backed into the trio while they were sitting on the bench in front of the fireplace. Chase called and told me while I was at work.
Katie’s Reaction: Asking repeatedly if Chase was sure that it was broken beyond repair.
Braxton’s Reaction: Unsure but am guessing that he heard me on the phone because his next reaction (see example #3) was visibly more shaken.
Example #3 Approximately December 2008
Culprit: Izzy
This one is especially painful because Izzy loved this ornament so much. She was just barely one year old and she looked right at this ornament and said “Gordy” (which is the name of our Chihuahua) clear as day. It was the first time that I ever remember her making the connection between a picture and a live thing. Izzy pulled it off the tree to bring it to me and dropped it on the tile floor.
Katie’s Reaction: Bawled and tried to glue it back together.
Izzy’s Reaction: Looked at me and then went back to the tree to find another “Gordy” ornament. But there were none to be found.
Example #4 Approximately January 2007
Culprit: Braxton
The tall one on the right is jimmy rigged with a paper plate. Just in case you couldn’t tell. They were sitting on my countertop table and my nephew was goofing around and slammed into it.
Katie’s Reaction: Freaked out. Spent a week trying to track down a replacement through the manufacturer to absolutely no avail. I know I’m crazy. That’s why I’m calling myself out.
Braxton’s Reaction: As soon as it happened, he looked up at me with big eyes. I tried to suppress myself though I’m sure I didn’t do a good job.
Example #5 Approximately July 2009Culprit: Izzy
This one is painful but for financial reasons. I got this ornament when I was pregnant with Izzy and I loved it because it was a First Christmas ornament. I stored it in a special box that was engraved with her name. Sometime last July, she found it and smashed it.
Katie’s Reaction: Sad. But I know the world of Hallmark Ornaments and I know they go on eBay for pennies on the dollar. So I looked this one up. Of course it was the rarest (is that really a word?) one they made that year and they are going for $90! It could have been my ticket out of here.
Izzy’s Reaction: What ornament?
Example #6 November 2009
These teacups have been hanging over my sink for four years. Ever since I carted them 4,000 miles across the ocean last time I was in Europe. I have never had a problem but alas one has been broken. And very recently. Leading to this post actually.
Britney’s Reaction: “That’s really not a good place for those.”
Katie’s Reaction: Trying to be humble, knowing that I have a problem. Outwardly I said, “I know, I will have to move them.” Inside I was screaming, “They have been there for FOUR years without a problem. WTH???!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?”
I told you this wasn’t going to be easy for me. Next time I see you face to face and I start acting like a baby about something silly, please bring it to my attention. I need all the help I can get ;)
2 comments:
I am just so relieved I didn't make the list.
i am surprised your list started only after the new millenia. i was expecting all sorts of memories...their absence suggests that you are learning to let go.
Post a Comment